A Frenemy Situation

My friend acts nice in front me but when we're not together, she says some awful things about me. She also gets mad at me for a reason I don't even know. What should I do?

Love says:

I’m guessing there’s this “frenemy” thing going on between the two of you. One minute you’re friends; the next, you’re not. Sometimes it’s normal to go through instances like yours but if it happens frequently then there must be something wrong.

A true friend will never stab you on the back or talk bad about you to other people. Moreover, he/she will tell you everything may it be good or bad straight to your face.

There must be a reason why she does these things to you that you may not be aware of. Maybe you have offended her unintentionally, or maybe you made a joke that she didn’t like. Try to find out by means of talking to her one-on-one. Clear things up with her.

If by any chance, you really have done nothing against her and yet she continues to hate on you then I think there is no reason for you to be friends with her anymore. I don’t think a “friend” with that kind of attitude will help you become a better person. Just let her do as she pleases but try to still be nice to her no matter what. 

Always forgive your enemies or, in this case, your frenemies, nothing annoys them so much.

Image source: tumblr.com

xoxo,

Hate says: 

Love problems are easier to deal in Hate’s POV but, in friendship, there is a line that stops HATE to go all the way her thoughts. Friendship, indeed, is sacred.

Keeping it short and simple, I’ll say just deal with this like break ups. Revenge, move on, forget about your friend and eventually, you will find some new friend who will respect your friendship, nurture you, and love you equally.

But that’s not that easy, right? So let’s just deal with your problems, question after question…

What do you think is the reason why your friend is doing this to you?
Well, the obvious reason is that she’s jealous of you. When she’s with you, she acts all Angel. And when you’re not together, her Evil horns and tails pops out. I couldn’t think of any other thing why she’ll do that, but jealousy.

Why would she be jealous of me?
That I don’t know. Perhaps, you did something bitchy or there’s something about how the world looks at you when you are not with her. She knows you through her eyes and through the eyes of the world and she realizes that you are way much better than her.

Girls, especially best friends, hate this kind of competition. Best friends want everything equal—attention, popularity, boys, etc.—as much as possible. But when the crowd starts to recognize the one better than the other, that’s when the cat-fight and war flags rise up. The end of friendship. The start of a battle.

The question to you is: Do you still want that person to be your friend? Can you forgive and forget? Will you have that peace of mind after, that she will never DO it again?

If you answered YES. Good for you, live in a fairytale world…

Giggle with the bitch who talked against your back. Spend time with her, listen to her evil stories! Life is so wonderful! It’s full of sunshine, lollipops, rainbows, and everything that's wonderful!

But don’t message me whining…that the BITCH is back.

Always,

PS: Revenge is sweet. You know the ways to your sweet revenge, my dear! After all, birds of the same feather flock together. Oh, I didn’t say you are a B, you thought of that.

LIKE or LOVE

What if you already have a girlfriend and the girl you've always liked came to you, waiting for you to court her, what will you do?

Love says:

This must be one of the most common causes of problems lately: people getting into relationships without being sure if they’re ready to commit despite “distractions” like this.

You see, there's a big difference between simply liking someone from loving them. For all we know, you may only be suffering from severe infatuation for the other girl. Are you or are you not?

There's a big, big difference between love and infatuation. Keep in mind that infatuation plants the false thought that you’re inlove with someone. It's more of a fantasy than reality. On the other hand, love is all about reality: accepting the good and the bad side of a person, the willingness to understand your differences, seeing each other grow old together, and so on.

I think you should ask yourself if you really, really love your girlfriend. If you do, and you can’t bear waking up the next day without her in your life, then it’s clear that you shouldn’t pursue the girl you just like.  I mean, you could be friends with each other but nothing more.

For the other girl, there’s still a lot fish in the sea (like what they say). It's human to like someone and want them for yourself but if they’re already in a relationship with someone, wouldn't that be a little selfish?

P.S. ♥

Before you make decisions, don’t only think about the person who will benefit from it, think more of those who could get hurt once the decision has been made.

xoxo,

Hate says: 

If what my girlfriend and I have is REAL… I will definitely leave her for “awhile” and play fire with the girl I always liked! Hey, it’s like hitting the jackpot in a lottery, eating edible gold, meeting Steve Jobs—once in a lifetime chance and things like that never happen in the everyday of our lives.

Image from: FemaleParent

Don’t judge, buddy! I’ll just leave my girlfriend behind for now. I know even if I make mistakes a zillion times, my girlfriend will still be there welcoming me with open arms and will still be loving me unconditionally because that’s what REAL love is all about.

I just want to feel how it is like to have that one damn thing I always liked. It’s not that I will love her for real and totally forget about my girlfriend. Believe me, I know that the love my girlfriend and I have can bring a hundred and one soldiers down. We can pass this like a test from the heavens… [YES, TRUE LOVE!]

When I remember…

the times I cried over the girl I always liked...

the endless nights I think about this girl...

how my heart breaks and aches for this girl...

How can I just ignore her? And knowing that this girl is waiting for me to court her... There’s a large speech bubble on top of my head saying: “IT’s MY TURN!”

Why are you raising an eyebrow? Get the hell out of this blog and listen to Kanye West’s Runaway. Burn me in hell but I’m not gonna change my mind!

Always,

PS: And if after being with this girl, my girlfriend couldn’t accept me anymore, then, it was never TRUE LOVE. See, she’s the one who broke my heart! All these time… I thought what we have was… T-R-U-E. 

To Post or Not to Post?

Is it acceptable to post your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend’s picture/s on your Facebook, Myspace, or any other social networking profile?

Image from: http://hannahavila.tumblr.com/

Love says:

I would say, YES and NO.

Yes. I think it’s OK to have some photos of him/her in your profile given the following conditions:

• You and you’re ex have agreed to remain friends and you have no hard feelings against each other.
• The photos posted in your site look “friendly.” It’s alright to post them if the photos there were taken when you still weren’t together-together (you know what I mean).
• You didn’t put your photos with him/her in just one album.
• It’s not only the two of you in each picture. That would probably give a wrong signal to everyone who views your album.

No. If that person did hurt you on purpose and left you crying, it’s better not to leave traces of him/her in your profile…most especially in the form of pictures. This would only lead you into remembering him/her more when you’re supposed to be keeping yourself busy with other things so that you won’t be left alone thinking about your moments together.

To me, deleting everything that has to do with your ex is already a good first step to moving on. Look at it as a new beginning, a clean slate. 

Instead of absent-mindedly looking at your pictures together in your social networking profile, why not replace those photos with pictures of yourself enjoying a day at the spa, eating-out with friends – pictures that show you are happy being single.

Think about it.

 xoxo

Hate says:

God's sake..............NO!

Why would you post pictures of your EX, btw? Your ex will only think that you are still “head-over-heels and like a slave-worshiping-a-king” in love with him/her. Are you out of your mind?

Do I hear you whining, “But I’m really over him!!! I don’t mind posting this and it’s just to remember our beautiful memories together”? Sweetie, I know you are better than that. It only makes you look stupid, very very very stupid. Your picture together only reminds you that something so sweet and perfect can turn into something that's bitter and broken. It shows the proof to the whole world how not a material BF/GF you could be.     

Don’t keep anything that deals with the EX, it is “the past” [Oh, if you have a kid, keep it… the kid!] and that’s enough reason to delete him/her in your life. It time to truly MOVE ON sweetie.

Wait!!! Why would you want the whole world to see something that has ended and that is in the past? Why not post some hot pictures of yourself [because you bloomed so much after him/her], the places you go [that he/she can’t go because of not enough money], the cool people around you [because, in lay man’s term, he/she’s a jerk] and the new memories you have [he/she won’t be even in dreams]?

Are you deleting it now? Very Good!

And hey, don’t just delete it on Facebook, Myspace or any other social network site; delete your EX in your life.

PS: It’s acceptable to post your EX’s picture if he/she is already dead. HAHAHA!

Always,